Sunday, July 8, 2012

"Curiosity Smokes the Crack"

They have this saying in Narcotics Anonymous about how even before use most Addicts had a attraction or curiosity for the Drug life style! I believe this is true, that I already had the disease of addiction living dormant inside of me! I come from a family of addiction, on both sides of my family! My farther was a alcohol, crack addict and all my uncles are Heroin, Crack addicts! My mother was a Chain Smoker who quit back in 1993 and admits she never drank or smoked because she could see a pattern of substance abuse in her family that she didn't want to fall victim too! So soon as I was old enough I started having street aspirations! I wanted to get some (work)crack to sell! I saw that the junkies had to have it and from social studies class I knew Crack was a commodity! This was some thing its costumers had to have and I was infatuated with it's life style! A grown man will beg a child, a woman will have sex with a child and a child will turn against his friends and community over the kind of money this drug generates!

I had this costumer Kieth back when I live up in Northbrook Township back in the early 90's! He got high but I liked him and I was sympathetic to his plite. He must have liked me too cause I would follow him around all the time asking him questions about crack and the drug game or he would be following me around doing favors or taking me around to all of the Crack houses so I could sell my Crack! My connection with this drug game was a little more than my other juvenile dealer contemporaries! Back then I remember it was this lady name Lisa, she lived up in Deep in Wood apt! Same neighborhood, she ran a crack house, all day long I would sit in there selling crack watching them hit the pipe, smelling the aroma of the coke and watch them geek! Crawling around on the ground looking for rocks, getting naked, hiding pipes! I was enticed and found this lifestyle entertaining and interesting! Little did I know I was being groomed by a predisposed dormant addiction! Training me, being patient and like a coiled viper waiting to strike!

All my life I knew better, Crack is against the code in the hood! As time go on I began to rationalize  and intellectualize possible drug use! Using my intelligence and reasoning to justify to myself why I think it would be cool to use cocaine and Crack! I'm grown now but I have all these Ideas about how good cocaine and Crack must be from all that observation of users I sold to as a teen! They looked happy and satisfied, it must be right! Its still no reason to put aside your self respect and go buy it for yourself and your dormant addictive nature knows your likes, dislikes and weaknesses and the perfect delivery system of Crack just for you!

For me it was pretty girls! Even before I was getting high I liked tricking with the girls who fell victim to the pipe! Not using it but staying close staying up on where it was! Once it all went down, I saw that it was all by design but as the maze was being built I was blind! I should have known better, regular kids and young adults normally don't participate in the illegal drug activities, but I did! In Baltimore City though you see more abnormal than normal on a regular basis or it's only a few doors or buildings away!

Now things have come full circle and I'm the junkie and kids are serving me! I think to myself how fast things can change. I even wonder about the fate of some of these kids that sell to me! I remember before Crack with it's highly addictive properties hit the streets, a lot of addicts on coke and heroin would run you off the corner for being to curious! Kick you in the ass and tell you get the fuck away from around there! Instead of all of this science of addiction! Before all this debate over whats the right philosophy of what causes addiction and the best method of treatment! Just kick you in the ass and tell you get off the corner and to get the fuck back on the steps! I wish someone would have done that for me!!!            

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

"Lucky Unlucky me"


I was hanging out with my homeboy Kay before I began using hard drugs! Kay was my man with everything & anything else! Ecstasy, Marijuana, Percocet, Zanni's, Oxy's,  what ever you wanted Kay could get it! Kay had been trying to get in touch with me since he got out of rehab in Missouri but I wasn't trying to play ball! I wouldn't take or return his calls! I had my own life going on and for some reason I just didn't want to get involved with Kay! This attitude I had towards Kay was kind of peculiar because, if you asked anyone Kay was my man, I loved this dude, he was my best friend in a long time! For some reason I just didn't want anything to do with this dude at this time! As I'm contemplating all of this I pull up on Highland ave. & Baltimore st.!

 The strip was really buzzing that Night out front the liqueur store on the corner! A lot of cars were pulling up and girls were jumping out with money in hand, walking super fast up to the dealers getting served and racing back to their cars taking off! It's was like a Crack express lane! I guess the liqueur store traffic masks the drugs traffic! I don't know where the Police are tonight, it would occur to me just to post up right here in front of the liqueur store but I guess then the dealers would find somewhere else to post up and sell their Crack! Who knows, just like everywhere else in Baltimore the Police are getting tired. Maybe it's an investigation going on, let them rock(sell) their Crack wide open(like it's legal), then come in and snatch every dealer and user with a solid case! That's the only thing I can Imagine because if this is not the case the Police are giving the dealers in this area free reign to sell drugs! This is only rumor but I've heard from a lot of the girl around their who Trick(prostitute),say that they know most of the police and provide sexual favors for some of the officers and in gratitude afterwards, a lot of the officers get talkative giving out information on police drug operations and stings! Which is then passed on to the dealers, from the working girls and the drug trade goes on!!!

I'm out on the strip now looking for someone I know who'll serve me, I don't see anyone and no one wants to take a chance on serving me! I'm in the car, out of the car, cruising around the block Baltimore st. to Conkling st. to Lombard st. and back around Highland ave.!!! I'm becoming frustrated! I have a pocket full of money but I'm being treated like a drug social leper! It's making me angry because I'm not hot or the Police but everyone is treating me that way and I know they got the drugs, I've just watched them serve like ten fiends right in front of me! So I get out the car one more time and as I'm getting out the car I see my girl Kelly, she's on her way to cop! She focus solely on her task walking right by me! I flag her down, telling her what's up, that I can't get anyone to serve me! She's laughing at me!!! "It's cause you a rookie, Y'all new Crack Smokers" "Don't worry though I got you baby, What you want? dimes or twenties and how many? I give here a hundred.  She says they'll throw in four extra and could she have them? I'm like cool and I go and wait in my car until she returns. I watched her from the car she's cute but we've always kept it strictly business!

 Theirs a guy waiting for her in a F150 and he's looking at me like who and the fuck I am! So Kelly comes out of the alley going left and the dealer is shortly behind her breaking right! The dealer looks suspicious fixing and arranging his pockets as he comes out of the alley! She goes past the guy she's with in the truck telling him to WAIT, real loud and animated!!! I'm hoping this doesn't break out into something too heated that could get us all arrested!!! She jumps in my car and says OK  nine for you and one for my trouble!!! I don't even get into the extra she talked about. One outta ten is the least I could do for her making the buy for me! She's making small talk now! So what you been up to and do I still live up on Montford? I tell her no. She smiles saying, "you and the girlfriend fell out?" She says, "well if you need some where to chill and smoke your Crack, call me!" I'm going to take care of this guy I'm with, then I'm going up my house! Make sure you call me we'll have a good time, seriously call me in like a half, OK! I smile and say, yes I will, she hugs me and I'm on my way! She's cute as shit as she runs and climbs up in that big truck smiling back at me!!! It's funny I've  seen her a million times out on these streets but she never let me know she had her eyes on me! Sometimes I've even thought she was a bitch, always with a funky attitude! I guess since I've moved she's missed me or missed seeing me around the Crack Houses!

A half hour later I've jumped on I-895 to I-97, I'm out Millerville on Quarterfield rd. My man Kay is out their staying with his sister. She's tired of him and in need a break! He brought her over here from Bahrain, it started out good but he's gone of the deep in and her loyalty to family is wearing then in the face of his heroin abuse! She doesn't know I'm gone too, If she did I'm not sure she would have turned her brother over so easy but I use to be someone you would have trusted your kids or your own personal safety with, let alone your brother! So I tell her we're cool and she gets a couple of hours peace to herself. She gives me a hug and me and Kay are out the door!

On my way out, I call Kelly telling her I'm on my way and she tells me she's got some girl friends up on Faimont & Patterson!!! She asks me to grab something to drink, Newport's a couple of stems and some fresh chore boy!!! I tell her  my man is with me and could she get some Dope(heroin) for him? She says cool just hurry up cause they really could use that drink & them cigarettes, sounding really up for a good time, I hear the girls having a good time in the background too!!! I'm exited and imagining the possibilities of what the night has in store! We get to the door and I knock, Kelly lets us in, hugging us both, welcoming us in! We walk to the back of the hall, their room is three door down the hallway! They have a one room apartment in the back! As we come in I see we have hit the jack pot I see all girls in their mid to late twenties! All small girls sexy and tight! Two brunettes and a red head, good times! Everybody has there own drugs too and are getting down to business! That's the best thing fucking with chicks down here all the tricks like white girls so they always have their own money!!! You can actually chill out and have a good time! I ask for Kay, who has some Dope? All them bitches got dope(heroin)! They speed balling sniffing dope and smoking coke!!! The girls are on Kay's dick! All over him, they say he looks like Collin Ferrel and they're showing him a lot of attention! So we good, Kelly is happy to see me and the other girls are basically  fighting over Kay!!!

 So Kay pulls out his tools and the girls are surprised he shoots up! They cool though and they are treating him like a King! One girl cooks the dope up for him, another ties him up and then the other girl shoots him up! He's getting a full service treatment! I watch the blood and heroin mix in the syringe as they pump it into his veins! They take out the needle and loosen the belt! It hits him, he begin to sweat a little and looks smacked it's good! The girls are all amused with his satisfaction! They are all laughing and high fiveing satisfied by how good the dope is and the effect its having over Kay! While Kay is being broken over by the waves of the heroin the girls are high and tipsy from the Red berry and Pear Ciroc Vodka I brought along. Now they are all trying to take advantage of Kay!!! My man is right in the mix of where most men would fight to be!!! I think he's kind of not with it, but three cute girls, the heroins good, he doesn't stand a chance! Now they have got his pants and underwear around his ankles and all three of them and sharing his dick and balls like a dessert from "Rita's" as they all take turns sneaking lustful peaks at me and Kelly on the bed together!!! I am about the walk over a join in but Kelly pulls me back onto the bed with her and sticks her hand into my pants, playing with my dick! My balls and groin clinches up like I'm about to premature ejaculate  and a hot waves rush over my face!!! Kelly starts to laugh and calls for the attention of the other girls they like, "look y'all he's blushing!" They all find this to be the funniest shit ever a black man light enough to blush!!! Nah nah, Kay, your no longer the cutest shit in the room!!!

 I guess the girls like their men in variety because now the girls are alternating between Me, Kay & Kelly!!! While Kelly is sucking my dick one of the other girls sits besides me and begins to massage my stomach and balls while Kelly is sucking my dick faster and faster as I tense up and cum over them both!!! Oh my God it feels so good, My dick is exploding pumping like a oil rig that just struck black gold! An they are both fighting for it!!! Licking, kissing and fighting all over it, back and forth up and down!!! I look over now and both of the girls with Kay are completely naked and there taking turns riding, fucking the shit out of him like hes quarter operated department store hobby horse! The dope has got his dick hard(They call this a doped dick) and these girls are taking full advantage of it like he's automated dildo! They're loving it as I'm watching them climb on and off of his dicks taking turns like a round robin game! Kelly ask me do I want to get in? I'm like, "yeah" but I just came! One girl yells out, "Sniff some dope!" I'm like I don't really like dope and I don't shoot up! She puts some heroin on a match book and I sniff it all back! I get immediately nauseous! They see it too," Girl hurry up, Girl hurry up, get the bucket he's gonna throw up!!!) I throw up too and I'm instantly high as shit! They're laughing now fiveing to each other! "Look at him girl, he's high as shit,this shit is the bomb, I told y'all, they care both fucked up!!!" They cleaned me up with Wet Wipes and Scope! Now we're all on the bed me Kay and the Four girl! Dicks hard as shit and in another world from the effects of the heroin! Everything is hazy like  a movie flash back scene!!! Its just a haze of flashes of  asses, pussies, titties, gasps screams and smiles as we fuck them all hard and vigorously!!! Making them all cum over and over and over!!! Until we put all of these Ho's to sleep. Soon after I pass out and go to sleep...

 Kay wakes me up shortly after I dose off.  It's day light he's whispering, "what the fuck are you whispering for?" I wake up all the girls! Everyone a little pissed I guess they wanted to sleep in! Kay says the police are out side! We all think he's paranoid! We look outside, Oh shit its our worse Nightmare, the whole police force are fucking out there! I'm getting dressed but my heart is slowly sinking! I'm thinking it's over for me! I'm probably going to spend the next seventeen years of my life in prison! They say life is full of bitter and sweets! Last night was a full of sweets so I'm dreading the possibilities of how bitter it's about to get for us! All the best memories of last night are flashing through my head, we had a amazing time last night four sweet asses and pussies in the air glistening with perspiration, game for some good dick and gave it up to us fully and uninhibited! Now is all about to end so badly!

 The Police hit each door one by one as the girls scurry to clean everything we had remaining from last night! The Police hit the door and we open up! One girl says, "Girl why you open the door?" I think to myself,"Yeah girl why you open the door?" They ask for all of our ID's they check them all none of us have warrants as the checks come back! One the cops finds a mirror with some crack and heroin remaining on it. They call in the Operations Commander! We all wait impatiently for the fate we know that soon to befall us all. The Commander comes in with a look of a disapproving Grandfather. He begins to lectures us all Individually and together! Our ID's say, none of us actually lived around there in that neighborhood! He sweeps the mirror off onto the floor and tell us their only there for warrants, and to get our things and get out! It's our lucky day!!! As we walk away down the narrow hallway free the other fugitives who haven't been so lucky are calling us all snitches and to never come around there again! One girl starts fussing with them about she ain't no snitch! Kelly puts her arms around her like,"Fuck them girl lets get the fuck away from here while we still can!!! We all leave in separate directions, Kelly looks back and mouths "Call me"! I muster what smile I can and nod my head yes. I don't want to appear too happy until I'm completely in the clear.

 Now I'm in the car taking Kay home I think to myself, God is sending me a message,"Everyday from now I'm living at the mercy of his time"!!! With a straight face, Kay asks me, do I want to go somewhere else to get some more drugs! He says it's a morning shop that's just opening over at the West Side Shopping Center!!! I just shake my head holding back my furry & frustration!!! I can barely muster it out but I say "Yo I'm taking you home!!!" He's still like alright yo, I just was saying, you can just drop me off I'll make my own way home!!! I'm still like, "YO, I'm taking you home".....