"One More Try"

Since I've began this blog twenty six days ago, I've been clean from all drugs and alcohol 33 days total! I know that doesn't sound like much but to some addicts that would be a hell of a Milestone! I remember watching shows like Maury Povich and seeing Meth Addicts tell these dramatic stories of recovery from Crystal Meth Amphetamines and in the same breath admit they have thirty days or less clean time! I would think to myself get the fuck out of here! As I would laugh and make light of their small to me, but very large accomplishment to them!

 I felt as though the studio audience was give the person to much credit to soon! Sometimes I felt like the sympathy involved perception bias, Maury's using young White Female addicts for these television recovery episodes vs a Black female addict, as this(white addict) would probably get a better sympathetic or empathetic response! I guess or my opinion was most American have a soft spot for the image of the young white female addict, but if you did the same show with young black females addicts would they receive the same empathy and understanding! I see it as the shows producers opinion that the black female or any male addict wouldn't garner the same sympathy from the studio or television audience. Even when both subject groups tell they're story of how they began to use drugs, the White female addict comes before the studio audience and can tell a tale of how they just didn't know any better and became hooked on their drug of choice! The studio audience immediately gives up their sympathy with gasps of breath, cries of sorrow, disbelief of how sad this all is and the sympathy of  what this poor child must have gone through!

 Then on the other hand with the black female addict the story has to be five times worse to receive the same sort of sympathy or billing for the audience to put themselves in this persons shoes! The black female addicts story has to horrible just to get some necessary and needed attention! It usually starts like, My Momma and Farther was on crack, my brother went to jail, my sister and I were in separate foster homes inside the same Project housing, then I was molested by my foster parents and became pregnant and then that's when I began to use Crack Cocaine! It appears to me it's a bias in perception between how people view white & black drug use! I think this is due to stereotypes people assume that the black addict should naturally know better! No matter how bad it gets you should culturally know better than to use drugs! As if some of our children and people aren't just as naive or prone to be taking advantage of by a more seasoned drug addicts as their white addict counter parts.

Now I'm not attacking whites in this post! I don't blame you, my people exercise the same bias from the same stereotypes! We fight like hell to keep our children out of the street and away from the drugs and crime of our community! A lot of our children are sheltered from the bad in their own neighborhoods and when come face to face with drug use and drug dealing experiences are naive and susceptible to get caught up in these life styles.

 Everyone hears the story of the good kid, how did they ever become involved in drugs? Its a attraction factor, always seeing the other side and alternative life style and being shielded and ushered away from these drug influences but not being educated as to why you need to stay away from this lifestyle and the pitfalls associated with it! So when our people become involved in drug they feel ashamed to come forward letting people know that they have a problem. Or when they finally do come out with the full extent of their involvement with drug use, they've been involved so long now it is a full blown addiction and a arduous and lengthier recovery process! Having lived in denial from the public as well as the scrutiny, indifference and public ridicule of their own black community! That by the time they come for some help it's a much longer and twisted road to recovery many times leading to a painful road of recovery and relapse that can sometimes be more painful than their actual addiction!

Just look at these cases in point, Whitney Houston, Martin Lawrence, Vesta Williams & Maia Campbell! All of these black stars were obviously addicted to crack cocaine but would not admit it, do to the taboo associated with crack use in the black community as well as the television and film representation of black people as being from the streets, or at least one to two degrees of separation from the streets! Making our people are scared to come forward for help, and now not only are we finding our neighbors on the streets, but in some cases or biggest and greatest stars on the street as well!

 Black people it's time to stop turning our backs and blind eyes to our people! Removing the astigmatism from Crack Cocaine use as well as Aids and give our lost and disbanded family members a visual and supportive path home back into our communities and Recovery! Not just the shame, looks of judgement and disapproval of a lifestyle they are actively making steps away from! That without our support may make it easier for then to turn back to Crack Cocaine Relapse versus Recovery! But Y'all don't hear me though!!!!!